Post by tantalizintina on May 21, 2008 20:56:10 GMT
Lewis wont take a bottle anymore,he just cries at it... i feel so down, im constantly cryin and i have really terrible thoughts about myself or lewis.. ive more or less thrown him, in his chair bcuz of it... my life is a mess... the consultant say he should be on 20oz aday but i cant get him 2 have 10... i feed every 3 hours and it takes a hour 2do so im more or less feedin all day... the only happy time in my life now is when im asleep... girls i know ive asked 4 alot of help but this 1 is the one i need help with the most........ please Tina x
Please go to the doctor or your health visitor and tell him or her how you are feeling. I speak from experience, you sound like I did after I had Aaron. You are a good mother but everybody needs a little help now and then. Don't be afraid to ask for help.
I have also got in touch with voluntary agencies such as Homestart, and The Princess Royal Trust (which deals especially for carers like us!)
I also have the Family Support from the Local Social Services which all help me with Aaron, because I am not Wonder Woman, but I need myself to be fit and able to cope.
I hope this is of some help.
Lynne & Aaron.
I will e-mail you my home and mobile numbers, please contact me if you need any help, that is what we are here for .
Tina, tomorrow you must do as lynnie says, I haven't been through what you have with Lewis but when our Rachel wasn't feeding properly & not gaining weight it was my HV that was there for me, & when I cried cos i had to bottle feed her after all my best efforts she was great . But your HV & doctor can help you and Lewis. I also had some support from Homestart & they were great support. Do you have contact with anyone from your DS group ? We have something in this area called face to face(I think) which if you'd like links you with someone who has a child with same type of special need & been through similar things . Sorry I can't be more help, just feel like you need a big hug. xSusan xSusan
hun dd started in 8ml a day and was feeding every 3 hourse i gradually increased her feeds is he bottle or breast hun cant remember maybe the floe of teat is too slow for him hun. and def speak to doc or hv hun xx
Post by pinkshell1110 on May 21, 2008 23:08:08 GMT
tina you must listen to everyone hun, we have all had exactly the same problems with our little ones please go see your gp in the morning or hv this does not make you a bad mother just someone who needs a little extra help, you have been through so much lately and you will get through it !!!!!!! please give me a txt or a ring tomorrow ,to let me know you are ok . we all have bad times hun i am havin one at the mo and am taking anti depressents and am off work with depression and stress, and i am sure everyone on here is the same every now and then, . the feeding will improve even if lewis has to have his ng tube back in, it's not a step backwards, but it will help him to move forward and it may give you the rest you desperately need. lots of love n snuggles hun please listen to everyone and speak to someone tomorrow take care babe love shell xxxxxxxxxxxxx
aww tina, firstly sending you a hug because it sounds like you could do with one. I know it won't make you feel any better but Lucy Never took the amount of milk she was meant to, and still doesn't, She used to take ages too, and it felt like all i ever did was feed her. I hope you can talk to your HV or gp and get the support you need. It may not work for you, but i have 1 night off a week, where i go around a friends house/pictures or even bingo so I can have a little me time. Believe me it makes such a difference. Lots of love and hugs things will get better, i promise you. x
Hi Tina, how are things today. Like the others have all said you must talk and get some support for yourself. You're not doing anything wrong, you've just had so much to cope with. We all get a black times so don;t feel like you're alone, we're only human and can only take so much. If you ever want to meet up or want me to come and visit you I can do, you're not very far away from me. Take care and remember we're all here for you, and with all your experiences you will be the one helping somebody else one day. Lots of love Claire xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Post by tantalizintina on May 22, 2008 17:19:46 GMT
Hiya ... thankyou so much 4 ur replies... I'm ok 2day and u'll b glad 2 know that Lewis is too..... I've been demand feeding 2day & he's taken his milk better & taken more he's also had a rusk & a little food @ lunch.. Im gona have 2 get him weaned pretty quick.... I really am quite ashamed of myself, i'm a 40yr old woman and ive bought up 2lads... i do intend 2 see the doc about how down i feel tho... ive swedpt it under the carpet long enough XXX once again thanks Tina XxX
tina i hope you feel a bit better today.... is there anyone you can leave lil lewis with for a couple or hours to get ya self a break? i have noone i can but know it would of done me good if i had..wot everyone else says comes from me too... take care missus...xx
good to hear things have been a little better today. I had some medication from my doctor when i had a rough patch and they helped so much, there's no shame in it. Im telling you in the not to distant future everything will slip into place. xxxxx
Just wanted to send you lots of hugs and ditto what everyone says. You've been through alot with Lewis and it's bound to take it's toll, but it will get better. We all need help sometimes and the best people to get that from is someone who knows what you're going through and/or health visitor, paed community nurse, etc. Harry took quite a while to get his feeding sorted and I had days when I thought it would never get better, now he will eat and drink practically everything and anything! Good to hear you and Lewis are doing better today, take care xxx
gla to see you are doing a bit better - even 1 day can make such a difference. Everyone here has had some issues and worries and we DO get through them. Just think in a few months you will look at your hungry bouncing baby and think how did he ever not eat!!! Hope it goes well at the Dr, don't ever be ashamed to get help - it's there and you just have to grab it. You are a great Mum who has 2 big lovely lads and Lewis will be just fine - he comes from good strong stock - sounds like he is a strong willed chap already with refusing to take milk!
Just wanted to say please dont feel ashamed EVER... Youve been through loads and it can sneak up on you when you are least expecting it. Well done for being so open and honest - I'm sure many of us have felt similar (me included) so you aren't alone. xx
I am pleased to hear how much better Lewis had fed today , bless our little babes , they like to keep us on our toes ! You should never be ashamed of how you feel & sharing it here, I remember one night just blubbing all night about how I couldn't do this again ( bring up another baby) & I'm a 46 yr old with 3 older children ! We all need some help at times, sometimes it hits us when we least expect it. Take care of yourself & all your special family Susan
Glad to see you're feeling a bit better and that Lewis is feeding too. They have their off days just like we do - unfortunately they land on the same day sometime!!! You've gone through such a lot so far, and done so well. We are all allowed to have a shout and scream too!!
Glad to hear that your feeling a bit better and that Lewis is feeding. Your not to feel ashamed in feeling how you do, you have been through alot in the last few months, everybody has their off day's, I have been there aswell.
We all know what you're going through. It is so hard when they're small.
The docs says 20oz, the docs and everybody else said that to me too, Cameron had a very poor suck, you could sit for 1.5 hours feeding him 2/3oz, it was a nightmare.
As long as he's putting on weight, however little it be and hes not losing it then happy days and don't listen to the paeds etc too closely, every child is different and they have a bad habit of tarring them all with the same brush!
If he's falling sleep on feeds, then you should:
Take a layer off clothes of him blow in his face change his bum move about with him anything for him to feel cold air and wake him up again
Also is he teething?? If he's got sore gums then he won't want anything in his mouth.
Also remember to count to 10 if you feel angry with him, get one of the boys to take him for 5 minutes
Hello Tina Sorry i haven't seen your thread sooner but got cut off internet and only just back on. I too feel like you did sometimes, good and bad days. Its been an uphill struggle and it feels like every day there is another mountain to climb. Climb them we do tho and altho we sometime slip a bit backwards we just dust ourselves off and push on. My GP upped my antidepressants a couple of weeks ago and even though Rosanna seems to be all of a sudden feeding and drinking more of her milk it is still hard work. Her feeding tube came out 2 weeks ago and the dietician has said that providing she has put on some weight by next week it can stay out. She has had it most of her 9 months of life! I hope this message makes sense and if ever you need to chat just PM me and will get back to you as soon as i can.
Hiya Tina, Like Michelle, I haven't been on in a while but I hope things are getting a little better. What with all the stress of the heart op and now probs feeding, it's no wonder you're feeling down hun. I have a similar problem with Jasmine to be honest but I've just stopped worrying because she really isn't inetrested in milk or any fluids but loves her solids now she's a bit bigger so I sneak as much milk into those as I can. Most days I get about 8ozs down her and she should be having about 15. She seems healthy enough. In terms of your own situation, if you haven't already done so I would still get to the doctors, I'm not one to advocate it but maybe you need a little pick me up hunni. Let us know how things are going. Lucy x