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Post by karenh on May 4, 2010 9:45:13 GMT
Don't really know where to begin, Lucy is being referred to a physcologist, for her "behavioural problems" (i didn't think they were that bad tbh, just normal toddler stuff, but apparently not) I thought it was attention seeking and ignored the odd behaviour. Have to buy some "chewy" things to stop her eating paper and licking the walls... She is going to set up a meeting to discuss introducing melotonin to help her sleep at night and a physcologist to help get a sleeping plan and routine in place. (this has gone out of the window completely and the only way to get her to sleep is to rock her in her pushchair, I admit to being lazy doing this because she will drop off in about 20 mins, but if i put her in her cot she would be awake 2 hours later) Told to stop giving her bottles of juice throughout the day, 1 morning and evening and then if she's thirsty has to drink from a beaker. I feel like i've let Lucy down, as i didn't push her to use a beaker, the bowel clinic told me to concentrate on getting fluid into her, and while i offered the beaker probably didn't push her hard enough. Have been told if i can secure a nursery place she will ensure Lucy gets the funding for "one to one attention" as she will need it. I thought she was doing really well, but now think maybe im not pushing her as much as i should. Feel like a really bad mummy
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Post by tina79 on May 5, 2010 22:27:42 GMT
Hi Karen, sending you a big hug - it's hard not to feel a bit down after these appointments - after all we spend so long focusing on the good things its really hard when someone starts pointing out the negatives. Try and look at the positives though - at least she's being referred early for any behaviour probs so hopefully they can nip them in the bud pretty quickly and give you ideas for things to try as she gets older. Brodie went through the licking phase too - he would lick walls, bins and all kinds of other gross things. I'm pleased to say he's more or less grown out of it now though, although he will lick peoples arms from time to time - but i'm sure he does it for comedy value cause he gets a reaction from people! It's great to hear that she'll get 1 to 1 for her nursery place, do you know when she will start? Don't feel like a bad mummy, you're doing a great job
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Post by lisajg on May 9, 2010 12:48:06 GMT
Hi Karen, don't feel bad, you're a wonderful mummy I sometimes feel the same because some of harrys problems, but we all do the best for our kids and they're all different. I agree with Tina that it's good that you're getting a referral while Lucy is so young, Harry saw a clin.psychologist recently for his behaviour and he was 5 yrs old when he was referred. I found it helpful for harry to see the psychologist, but mainly because he just confirmed alot of what i already knew + made me realise i am already doing all the right things & also it helped to speak to someone who understood harry. Harry chews stuff alot, we started him on the chewy tubes, he would have the orange P&Qs and this helped to stop him chewing his hands which he was making sore. Now he has bandana bibs (i order them from one of my facebook friends who has a little boy with ds) - then if he wants to chew something he chews his bandana bib instead of his clothes or hands or feet! lol And don't feel bad about the drinking, you were doing what's best for Lucy by making sure she had fluids. Sometimes we have to prioritise what's most important, it's awful for our kids when they're constipated & fluids are so important in helping to alleviate that. Great that Lucy will get 1 to 1 support at nursery, so many people have to fight for that and it will help Lucy come on leaps and bounds. She's a gorgeous girl and you're a great mum xxx p.s. give me a shout if you need the details for ordering chewy tubes or bandana bibs, take care
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Post by karenh on May 10, 2010 9:44:53 GMT
Thank you Tina and Lisa
I have given myself a good kick up the bottom! I know I need to sort out the sleep and drinking and licking etc, but im going to tackle them in my time, and one at a time instead of trying to do it all at once.
I haven't sorted a nursery yet, my portage worker is going to visit some with me, and i think it will be good for both of us, and its great to know that she will get extra support. Her consultant is on the panel that decides who should get it, and she said Lucy will need someone who signs and with Lucy not walking be ready to intervene as necessary.
See im feeling much more positive this week lol xxx
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Post by sarah on May 11, 2010 12:10:49 GMT
I always think that if you are worrying about being a bad mummy, its because you are a GOOD one and want to do the very best! Bad mummies would't care or notice... its an awful feeling when something negative surprises you, but as the others say, you can work towards getting things sorted nice and early. You will be fine and Lucy is very lucky xx
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Post by odiness on Jul 6, 2010 21:31:53 GMT
Awww hunni, you're not a bad Mummy at all. To be honest I'm with you around not being able to distinguish typical toddler behavious versus abnormal / behavioural problems. I have friends with children of a similar age to Jasmine who are far worse behaved and yet I still often have to ask is she being naughty, is it frustration or is she just being 2? Being a parent unfortunately doesnt come with an instruction book so as long as you care and try your best you are being the best Mum you can be!
Jasmine definitely does things to get attention such as throwing, shouting, breaking things, slamming doors etc.... She is very disobedient, I darent use the words No, Dont or CANT because to Jasmine that means DO IT, lol. She has such a rebelious streak it is scarey but to be honest I like that about her because it shows character, she definitely understands discipline and right from wrong but she 'chooses' to be naughty, I like to think her behaviour will improve as she grows and is able to communicate better but in the meantime I am relishing the challenges!
Good luck with Lucy and please dont feel dispondent, I'm sure you will find that this is a typical toddler phase. x
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Post by lizzymd² on Jul 21, 2010 9:48:39 GMT
How is her sleeping? Has she been on a sleep study? Tell me about her sleeping before they give her drugs to sleep
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Post by karenh on Jul 21, 2010 18:54:55 GMT
Hi lizzy
Thanks for the reply....
Lucy did a sleep study and dr decided to take tonsils and adenoids out.... While that helped with the chest infections ... Her sleep pattern remained very erratic.
Before sleep medication, I rocked her to sleep in the pushchair (took between 30 mins to 2 hours to get her to sleep) she would remain unsettled all night, thrashing about, crying, and just generally not going into a deep enough sleep.
Now with sleep medication, she drops off within half an hour of being in her cot.... but within 1-2 hours she's thrashing about - lasts all night, im up between 1-8 times per night trying to get her back off.
Her thyroid levels haven't settled so poss relates to that, and I guess could also be impacting on her day to day behaviour.
Anyway, shes asleep now, so im making the most of a little peace.
Hope you are ok x
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