She's being doing it for months now, mainly if she doesn't want nappy changed, doesn't want to go out or doesn't want to sleep etc.
Its been steadily getting worse, but today, I think she would have driven a saint to swear...
Im trying to be light hearted, but I've actually spent most of the day in tears..,The only time she is happy is when mr tumble is on, so its been on a lot today. I've actually looked forward to nap and bedtime to have some peace.
I don't think medically there is anything wrong, no temp etc, I really think its behavioural. Im waiting for her phsycologist appointment, But Im having serious concerns at how long Im going to be able to cope with this.
If her drink isn't there instantly she screams, if you look at her the wrong way she screams if you touch her or sit too close to her she screams.
Timeout doesn't work she just doesn't get it, I sign NO and she screams I seriously don't seem to be able to do anything right.... Im sure my neighbours must think im hurting her, because its not normal help anyone please x
oh karen, wish i lived nearby and i'd pop round to give you a hug + it sounds like you need a break. i had serious problems with harry's behaviour which touch wood has now improved, it seems that his was largely linked with frustration at not being able to communicate so now that he uses pecs to communicate that really helps him. is lucy at nursery? just wondering if they are any help with this as it sounds like maybe lucy is feeling frustrated at the moment.
harry went through a phase of hitting and biting me alot and i would sometimes have horrid days like the one you've had today and it would upset me too so i really sympathise - if it was feeling like too much to cope with i would go in another room to calm down, quite often just by removing myself harry would be calmer too.
i saw a psychologist with harry and the main thing he said to me was for me to understand that harrys perception of the world is different to mine, therefore to fill his world with what he needs and enjoys, for example if he has a day when he just wants to watch mr tumble all day then that's fine. Don't feel pressured because 'society' would think it was wrong to let your kid watch tv all day - when harry's behaviour was at its worst there would be days when the only thing which made him happy was mr tumble & the psychologist helped me realise that was ok. our kids are unique which means we have to adapt day to day to what they need which can be very tough - i hope the psychologist appt comes through soon & you find it helpful, i definitely found it very comforting speaking to someone who understood harry because sometimes it can feel that not many people do.
you're a great mum & you're having a crappy time so you need a break, is there anyone who could help - even if just for a couple of hours? its not realistic for you to be expected to cope with this on your own, do you have a social worker who could organise some respite? ((((HUGS)))) xxxxxx
She starts nursery in september.. which at the moment can't come soon enough.
Her dad is coming to spend the day with her tomorrow, so there will be someone else to distract her. She's usually good as gold for everyone else, im sure everyone thinks i make it up!!
I have a playpen/ travel cot in the lounge so I pop her in there when it gets too much and I escape upstairs. That's good to know Lisa about the TV I always feel bad if she watches too much, but I don't think I will let that stress me too much now.
I have wondered (and I admit not to having much experience on this) If she could be autistic, I had mentioned it previously to the paediatrician, who wouldn't commit, but said she had some concerns over her behaviour, like the wall licking and spinning.. who knows any way im off to bed hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.
Oh sweetie - I really feel for you, but can't offer any personal advice i'm afraid. What Lisa writes seems spot on, and i think you are doing the right thing by seeing a psychologist or behavioral therapist. And please dont think it is you - as Lisa said our children are all so different and communication is such a massive area, they all have different ways/habits/ - its just some are more tiring/stressful than others. Look after YOURSELF too, give yourself a little break if you can - everyone needs to recharge now and again. Sorry i can't be more help. xxx
Karen, didn't want to read & not say anything , can't really help here ,I feel bad complaining about Rachel screaming the minute she sees the hairbrush but at least her screaming only lasts the duration of the hairdo. It must be so tiring for you, do you have anyone who could give you a break.Any chance your GP or HV could have a word to make the psychologist appt earlier ? It was good to hear lisa say about the tv etc sometimes I feel awful letting Rachel watch back to back Mr Tumble but it does give 15 mins + peace. take carexx
Hi Karen, bigs hugs to you. I can;t relate to the constant screaming but I do have days with George when I think I;m going to lose it. My main thing is how he treats his little brother, he gets great satisfaction from hurting him. People say 'oh well he doesn;t really understand' , but he does because he always smurks when I tell him off then goes and does it again. Its always if I;m out of the room and I'm sure its an attention thing as he knows I;ll come back in when Theo cries. Just lately he hits out at people, things, walls the car anything really. We also have big problems regarding food and I find mealtimes the most stressful times of the day, it usually ends up with me cleaning food off the floor, table and chairs etc and now Theo is starting to copy Georges behaviour. We have started seeing someone from CAHMS which is starting to help a little but we have along way to go. I can totally relate to the Mr Tumble thing as apart from when George is at nursery or in bed that is all that we have on. I;ve got about 40 of them recorded on sky+, but he goes through phases of which are his favourites and then requests them, so its very repetative. Occassionally he will watch pepper pig but nothing holds his attention like Mr T! I'm so glad Lisa to read Lisa's reply as I do feel guilty that he watches so much tv - I try and tell myself its ok as he;s learning the signs Sorry I can;t be of any specific help but wanted you to know that we all go through these low points and I;m sure that when Lucy goes to nursery you will see a difference in her behaviour. Keep your chin up hun and don't be afraid to ask for some help off friends and family so you can get out of the house. love Claire xxx
Hi karen Awww big hugs, sounds like you're having a rubbish time of it.
I would call up your local social work department for a carers review or seek out your local specialist health visitor, they can be quicker than psychologists and are often good at speeding things along
Also the nursery Lucy is attending in September is it a special needs nursery?
Cameron has attended a SN nursery since he was 8 montsh old and has benefited from early intervention in a specialised enviroment who are equipped and experienced
Good to hear social services are going to do a carers assessment & fingers-crossed it leads to some respite for you. Maybe in the meantime Lucy's Dad or another family member could give you a break, even if just for a couple of hours.
I think most of us are probably guilty of putting on a brave face when the truth is we're overwhelmed & need a break - i was the same with Harry & probably still am sometimes. I've learnt to ask for help & although its taken a while to get there its definitely worth pushing for. Harry has a couple of wonderful carers who provide respite & they are close friends now & like extended family.
Let us know how you get on will try & remember to keep popping back on here to check in with everyone, take care xxxx